Should You Give Children Everything They Want?

We live in a society obsessed with material goods, which has a big impact on children and their wishlist grows all the time. Kids may ask for all sorts of things – toys, the latest gadgets, the trendiest clothes – and this can be a frenzy that doesn’t stop. Parents naturally want to please their children and they can give in to their requests out of the fear that their children will feel less loved if they say no. However, setting some ground rules is essential if we want our children to develop into strong and responsible individuals.

Why It’s Hard To Say No

Parents are often unwilling to deprive their children of their wishes and unable to set limitations. It may be because they fear the child’s negative reaction and disappointment. Parents want the best for their children and they’re always happy to put a smile on their child’s face by fulfilling their wishes. They also want to provide a quality life for their children and enable them to enjoy the luxuries that may have been unattainable for them when they were kids themselves. Additionally, children may want a particular item just because all their friends have it. Parents may fear that their children won’t be accepted by their peers if they don’t follow the same trends, so they succumb to the pressure. What parents don’t realise is the consequences such actions have on their kids’ future development.

Growing Into Accomplished Adults

Children are already consumed by mass produced stuff. They get the latest models of mobile phones, tablets, and laptops even if they don’t need them. Instead of playing with their friends outside, boys spend endless hours in front of the computer. Girls aged 10 are preoccupied with their looks and are racing each other to see who will have the most expensive clothes. They’re entering the adult world way too fast and missing out on the chance to truly enjoy their childhood. Apart from this, giving your children everything they want may have a negative impact on their ability to deal with certain kinds of situations later on in life. Even now, we are witnessing generations of young adults who had all their wishes fulfilled while growing up, and now they can’t manage to get by on their own. They had everything they wanted exactly when they wanted it. Instead of becoming strong and confident people, they end up lacking the skills to cope with life.

Sustainable Living

Parents have the important role of teaching their children about sustainable living. They need to show their children how to refrain from impulsive buying and get things they actually need, not just want. For example, teach them to be eco-friendly by having them make new toys using a variety of reusable materials instead of buying new ones. Instead of shopping for expensive clothes, show them ways to find quality clothes at low prices by exploring sites like PatPat. Kids may find it easy and amusing, as they can already handle technology very well. This doesn’t mean that you should refuse every request they have, you just need to make sure that it doesn’t turn into lavish spending.

A Constructive Response

Whether you plan to say yes or no to your child’s request, always listen carefully to what they have to say. If you’ve decided to say no, give them your reason for it. This may help them understand and accept your decision. Once you’ve made a decision, stick to it, so that your children know you’re serious. You also need to be consistent in what you allow and don’t allow, as children remember this and may use it to convince you to grant their wishes. Also, if they accept your decision calmly, tell them that you’re proud of their good behaviour.


We’re not doing our children any favours by teaching them they can have everything they want right away. Setting boundaries and clarifying what’s permitted and what isn’t helps them grow into functional and responsible people.

 

About author – Tracey Clayton is a full time mom of three girls. She feels she knows a thing or two about raising happy, healthy and confident kids, and offers helpful advice in hers parenting articles. She’s also passionate about fashion and healthy living. Her motto is: “Live the life you love, love the life you live.”

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