Going through a breakup can be tough. Even if it was amicable, it brings along big changes. From simply not feeling it anymore and realizing you’re better off as friends to possibly having to move out or get divorced and decide on the custody of the kids, breakups come in all sorts and shapes. However, if you are looking to get back on the market, you might need some help. Keep on reading for a few tips when it comes to dating after a breakup.
Take time for yourself
First of all, before you can start dating again, you need time to heal, especially if the breakup was rough. Take all the time for yourself that you need to close the previous chapter of your life. If you bring baggage from the last relationship into your new one, it can be very challenging. For instance, you don’t want to text your ex when drunk as that can send you down the wrong path. So, work on yourself and focus on self-love. Get back in touch with things that you love and that make you you, whether that is cooking, hiking, or writing.
Decide on what you are looking for in a person
By getting in touch with your interests and reflecting on your past relationships, it might be easier to figure out what it is that you are looking for in a partner. For example, you can write a list of things that simply didn’t work for you in terms of exes. See which traits you value most and which attract you but might not fit in with where you see yourself in the future. Are you looking for marriage? Do you want kids? Like it or not, all of these topics will have to be discussed at some point if you are looking for a stable and long-lasting relationship.
Discover your options
While on the topic of long-lasting relationships, it’s important to know all your options. If you were just in a long relationship, you might be looking for a rebound or a fling. While some people don’t want to even consider these options, dating apps are a great way to meet someone if you only want a hookup. And, who knows – it might grow into something more. On the other hand, if you want a serious relationship straight away, you can rely on relationship experts and matchmakers who have experience with both straight and same-sex couples. For instance, you can turn to a trustworthy gay dating service that has the goal of finding you your perfect match. Of course, going out and meeting someone new or being set up through friends are all valid options as well, so stay open to suggestions.
Don’t compare people to your ex
Regardless of which one of the previously mentioned methods works, you need to learn not to compare the people you meet to your ex. When on a date, it’s easy to start talking about what you’ve been through, which naturally leads to mentioning your ex-partner. Try your hardest to avoid this topic. Sure, you can mention why it didn’t work out but don’t focus on them and make them the central topic of your date. Focus on the person you are with and ask them various questions to learn more about them. Constantly bringing up your previous relationship will also indicate to your date that you are not ready to move on. Plus, it will not be good for you in the long run. There is a reason why your relationship didn’t last and you don’t want to be stuck in the past.
Moving on from a relationship is different for everyone. If you were not invested in the first place, it will be easy to find someone new. However, if you saw yourself having kids and growing old with your previous partner, getting back on the dating scene can be difficult. To move on, allow yourself enough time to heal and keep your options open.
Author Bio: Jasmine Anderson is a Sydney based lifestyle blogger and a full-time toddler mom, with a Fine Arts Bachelor’s degree. Expressing herself through different mediums is what keeps her spirit bright. She loves to spend quality time with her family, go thrifting, and spend just a little bit too much time on the internet. Twitter: https://twitter.com/AndersonJess_AJ