Nobody wants to worry about their kids. But sometimes it can happen. No matter how safe and secure they are, you keep playing mind games with yourself, going through a long list of what ifs. Such as:
- What if my child gets sick?
- What if my child hurts themselves?
- What if my child does something bad?
These nagging conversations often go on and on without any end in sight. But it turns out that there are things you can do to prevent them. It just requires changing your approach to parenting.
But why do we worry about our kids so much? Well, for one, we feel completely responsible for them. Society says that anything that children do is entirely the fault of the parent. So we’re scared both about our children themselves, and society as a whole.
We’re also dealing with issues ourselves a lot of the time. How well we look after our children relates to our self-worth. We need to feel like we’re doing a good job, and not just throwing caution to the wind.
Plus many of us have a certain idea of how our kids “should be” as parents. So it can be distressing when they begin to develop their own ideas.
So what can you do to stop worrying about your kids? Check out some of these ideas:
Avoid Labelling Your Kids
A good first step to feeling better about parenting in general is to stop labelling your kids. Calling them something as innocent as “good boy” could begin to mould them in the wrong direction. Try instead to just allow your child to develop under his or her own steam. Trust the natural direction that their personality and development takes. Ultimately, if you leave them to their own devices, a robust personality will emerge without the need for any help from you.
Rearrange The Crib
If you’re worried about your child’s sleeping arrangements in another room when they are young, you can invest in a bedside crib. This way, you can avoid some of the stress involved with not quite knowing what’s going on.
Try Not To Hover
Hovering over your child all the time is the perennial habit of the anxious parent. You’re constantly worried that your kid might touch something that they shouldn’t. But hovering creates risks of its own. Your child is much more likely to develop anxieties and become unable to make decisions for themselves. The best approach is to allow them to take risks so that they learn the consequences of bad action. It can be tough as a parent to allow this to happen, but it is entirely necessary for proper development.
Don’t Make Your Child The Center Of Everything
If you can, avoid using your child to meet your emotional needs. Instead, make it clear to them that you have your own interests and life to pursue, separate from them. You can be happy without the need for external things, including your kids, though they are a nice thing to have in your life.