Home » A Dad’s Survival Guide to Going Through a Divorce

A Dad’s Survival Guide to Going Through a Divorce

Divorce is challenging for all involved but, in some instances, dads don’t always have equal access to their children as mothers do. In this article, we’re going to provide a survival guide for dads going through a divorce.

Divorce is never simple, especially when you share children and have spent many beautiful years growing your family together. In many cases, men may find that access to their children becomes trickier post-divorce.

divorce solicitors in London, Loughborough, Leicester, or wherever you live, can of course help make the entire process easier on you, so you can maintain your parent-child relationship. A solicitor can help find a child arrangement agreement that suits both of you, meaning you don’t lose your rights as a father.

With 1 in 3 married couples divorcing, many people have a parental relationship that they need to uphold for the sake of the children. So, to help you during your divorce and the many years of co-parenting, we’re here to provide a dad’s survival guide to divorce. Keep reading to find out more…

Why can divorce be difficult for dads?

Less Access to Kids 

Unfortunately, in this day and age, child custody hasn’t moved forward with the times and, quite commonly, mothers are granted full custody of their children. Statistics show that 71% of mothers obtain sole custody, whereas only 7% of dads are awarded sole custody. The remaining 21% are parents who have joint custody of their children. 

These statistics show exactly why dads are often concerned about the future of their parent-child relationship and why divorce can be extremely difficult for men to go through. While they do give the assumption that dads are less likely to have access to their children, it doesn’t mean that they won’t. 

Not having frequent access to your children when you have spent every day of their life living with them can be understandably difficult and upsetting to come to terms with. There might be big milestones that you miss, such as the first day of school, first words, school plays, etc.

While there are these concerns during divorce, there is the possibility of finding a child arrangement agreement that still allows you to have the contact you desire with your children. Speaking to a professional from a family law firm can help put your mind at rest. They will talk you through the arizona divorce process, or divorce process in your area, and discuss your options regarding child arrangements, helping you to get what is right and fair for all concerned.

Men Are Less Likely to Speak Out 

Sadly, there is a stigma surrounding men talking about their emotions, often leaving many to avoid discussing the times when they are down.

Unfortunately, men’s suicide rates are far higher than women’s, with the male suicide rate being 15.3 per 100,000 in 2020. The statistics are even higher for those aged 45-49 (23.8 per 100,000), and the age where divorce is most common is 46.4 years old.

What these statistics sadly show is that many men and dads struggle with divorce and often feel like there is no way to speak out about how they feel. 

How can you survive your divorce as a dad?

Find an Amicable Child Arrangement Agreement With Your Ex-Spouse

When you go through a divorce, you and your ex-spouse will need to make living agreements concerning your children. This can be done either between yourselves through private negotiation, mediation or in a court setting where a judge will determine what they believe is in the best interests of the child. 

The best way to get what you want concerning your child, such as where they will live and the amount of contact and the type you have, is by privately discussing matters with your ex-spouse and coming together to find an agreement which best suits you both. 

Speak to Family and Friends 

Don’t keep your emotions bundled up. If you are struggling, talk to someone you trust, whether that is a friend, family member or a professional. Your loved ones want what is best for you and will always be available to listen with open arms and ready to provide advice. 

Understandably it can be difficult letting people see your sensitive side, but everyone has emotions, and you shouldn’t be scared to show this side. 

Getting help is important, as depression is a real thing and is one of the biggest killers among men. There are many different organisations out there that can provide sensitive support and advice for those who are struggling. Examples of organisations that can help include:

  • Mind 
  • Mental Health Foundation 
  • Kooth

You Can Survive Your Divorce

What we can conclude from this article is that surviving your divorce is possible. It may feel as if nothing will get better, that you won’t be as close to your children and all sorts of other concerns, but that’s not the case. 

With the right strategy, you can get through your divorce while maintaining a healthy relationship with your children and your own mental health. 

Are you a dad that’s been through a divorce? Let us know your best tips for coping and moving forward with your life.