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How to Help Your Children Cope with Your Divorce 

If you are currently navigating an unexpected or planned divorce, you may be wondering how to help your children cope with the ongoing divorce proceedings as they gradually become aware of what is happening. It can be difficult to know where to begin when it comes to explaining your divorce to your children but the more you involve them from the beginning, the more likely they are to understand. If you are in this position, continue reading to find out everything you need to know ahead of time.

Remind them that they are loved by both parents

It may sound like an obvious point but as your divorce rages on, your children may need to be reassured that they are loved by both parents on a regular basis. It can, after all, feel, at least from their perspective, as if one or both parents have decided to abandon them during a crucial point in their lives and that they are to blame for the breakdown of your marriage. If you are struggling to know how to remind your children that they are loved by both parents, it may also be worth discussing the topic with your soon-to-be ex-spouse ahead of time to ensure the entire process runs smoothly. 

Answer any questions they may have 

If your child is struggling to cope with your ongoing divorce, you may find they ask you a series of blunt or direct questions from time to time. It can be tempting to provide a vague answer or gloss over the truth, but it may benefit you, and your children, to answer any questions they may have as truthfully as possible to prevent any misunderstandings down the line. If they have questions about how you and your ex-spouse will continue to provide for them as they grow up, for example, doing your research can allow you to make the most of information and tools that are readily available online, such as a child maintenance calculator, for example, so you can keep them in the loop. 

Maintain their usual daily routine 

It can be difficult for children to adjust to the break-up of their parents’ marriage. It may, therefore, benefit you to maintain their usual daily routine if and when you can to prevent your ongoing divorce proceedings from having too much of an impact on their life at such a young age. If you are usually responsible for driving them to school and picking them up at the end of the day and cooking them dinner at the same time every weekday, for example, continuing to do so can ensure they are exposed to as little disruption as possible. 

Continue to speak of your spouse amicably 

It can be tempting to respond to a divorce with anger and resentment in the heat of the moment but, at the end of the day, you are still talking about your children’s mother or father. It may, therefore, benefit you to continue to speak of your spouse amicably if and when you can around your children to remind them that you will continue to maintain a sense of mutual respect and co-parent in a way that suits everyone involved.

If you are experiencing an ongoing divorce, it can be difficult to navigate the topic with your children. It can, however, help them to remind them that they are loved by both parents, answer any questions they may have, maintain their usual daily routine, and, last but certainly not least, continue to speak of your spouse amicably whilst you are around your children.

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